Archive for April, 2009

Creative Despair

The ATEC wasn’t as bad as I thought. In fact, it was less tiring than the one I went for last year. Nonetheless, the conditions were far from ideal. Plenty of screw-ups before, during and after the exercise. One idiotic one was forgetting to bring the picnic lantern. How can anyone forget to bring the picnic lantern and set up BCS at night!? The weather on the first day was incredibly hot as well. We were so tired after setting up that we were all lying inside tent groaning and lamenting the heat. It was so bad that the Senior Medic and Signaller elected for a bag of Ringer’s Solution infused into them.There were some pretty comical scenes as well.

There was one time when me, two of the medics and the signaller went to dig the latrines. It was damn hot. So were taking turns with the ET stick and blade to dig two holes, when our signaller decided to take over. He was hacking away at the soil and began to to become frustrated because the rifle kept slipping down while worn in backsling. That annoys the hell out of everyone.

Signaller: Ok screw this, I don’t care if I get extras, I’m taking everything off. (Proceeds to take off helmet, webbing and weapon)

He continues hacking away for a couple more times when suddenly he faints and slams into the ground. We could hear the ‘Piak!’ sound generated by his body contacting the ground.

I looked at the other two medics and mumbled, ‘This is not good’. So the three of us starting shaking him and trying to wake him up. After thirty seconds he suddenly opens his eyes and swears loudly. Hahaha, it was really funny.

Upon returning to unit, I was kept busy with duties, preparation for brigade exercise and the usual torrent of paperwork. At least I managed to take some time off to do some of my personal tasks. The time off balanced out the looming datelines, irritating phone calls and obstinate arrows homing onto me. I managed to catch Detroit Metal City. I managed to apply for school as well. There’s a chance I might be going overseas for further education, but nothing is set in stone yet.

From 13th to 15th of March, I was running a camp for the new appointment holders in Legion. Their response was really promising. Some of them have really great potential. Yet it remains as potential because their time to lead has not arrived. Who will take charge of these little ones? My cohort will all be moving on to the next phase in their life, yet I seem to be stuck here.

I am terrified at the prospect of taking over as junior curia president. The curia president MUST be a member of an senior praesidium. I am not, therefore I will be forced to join an senior praesidium. I will be honest: their meetings bore me to death! I cannot believe that I must sit through week after week of such meetings. Let’s not get started on the way these people do things.

Perhaps I am biased. Perhaps I am not giving others a chance. But there is something I’m sure of, that is, I’m not really sure where all this is heading and what it is supposed to mean for me.Yet ten years in the junior curia must culminate in this moment of truth.

Oh, it was only yesterday that I was the idealistic sec one boy who joined for the wrong reasons but grew to love this. Seniors came and went. Friends came and went. Yet I am still here. All this is definitely part of God’s plan. It feels like I am inching towards the edge of the cliff, and being commanded to jump off. Alone.

When will I rediscover the joy of being in the Legion? At present it seems like a burden.

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Most Sacred Heart of Jesus, have mercy on us

Immaculate Heart of Mary, pray for us

Our Lady of Mount Carmel, pray for us

Stella Matutina, ora pro nobis

Our Lady of Perpetual Succor, pray for us

St Michael the Archangel, pray for us

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St Benedict, pray for us

St Dominic, pray for us

St Anthony, pray for us